On Attracting a Trad Wife: Battle of the Brunettes

Andy Nowicki

I first became aware of Tara McCarthy when she operated under the Youtube moniker “Reality Calls” last November.

Back then, Tara presented herself to the world, not as a real person with an actual first and last name, but rather as a mere spookily disembodied clipped-Brit voice ominously narrating the newly-uncovered horrors of the Clinton campaign’s involvement in the grotesqueries of #Spirit Cookingand #Pizzagate.


Tara McCarthy, formerly known as “Reality Calls”

Her vocal presentation reminded me somewhat of a female Vincent Price, minus any vestige of a “campy” connotation carried by such a comparison; something in her very pronunciation of words caused the listener to shiver with dread. (All of which, of course, proved to be quite appropriate, given the terrifying subject matter upon which she was expostulating.)

Now that RC has become TM (that is to say, has “become who she is”) one half of the femme tag-team hosting the “Virtue of the West” podcast along with American author (and fellow cute young brunette) Brittany Pettibone, much of the mystique that accompanied her original spoken word presentations has subsided. But Tara still does good work, even absent the power of her former discarnate doom-speaker persona, so it is with some reluctance that I find I must criticize her recent video, “Advice on Finding and Attracting a Traditional Woman.”

In this episode of her Youtube podcast, Tara opts to field a query, presumably from a young male fan, concerning how he can best render himself husband-bait for a “traditional woman.”

I must admit that I find this very simple question– “How Do I Find and Attract a Traditional Woman?”– at essence quite absurd. It even makes me chuckle a bit, because I can’t just take the premise seriously.

Oh, to be sure, I believe that it is a real question, and that it was earnestly asked, and that Tara is here attempting to answer it honestly. And I even think I “get,” quite well, what probably motivates the framing of the question on behalf of the questioner, whomever he was. And it’s surely a question that lingers in the minds of many hopeful, if despondent, young men. For all that, I still find the very posing of this question to be sadly laughable, and the act of addressing such a question with sincerity to be an indulgence in preposterous nonsense.

For one thing, no two “traditional women” are likely alike. What one finds endearing in a man, another likely abhors. That they share an enthusiasm for tradition (however that tradition may be defined) doesn’t cause them all to find the same sort of guy irresistible. Naturally, if they are serious in their convictions, they would want a man who’s into tradition as well, but that doesn’t mean that any man who favors traditional trappings will automatically make them flip their drindls or start polka-ing or Maypole-ing across the wheat fields with giddy excitement.

But more importantly, while your desire to land a blushing maid from the shire to sire your “fashy” brood is perfectly understandable, how in the world do you figure that it is worth your while to pick someone’s brain about how best to transform yourself into a trad-lady-slayer? To ask yet again the pointed question I posed a short time ago: why do you wish to alter yourself to order to please some broad, the better to make her like you?

Why not just be the best man you can be, and see what happens from there? Isn’t that really all you can do, anyway?

I would have applauded Tara for saying something along these lines. Instead, she told the guy to learn self-defense and to become a reliable breadwinner, so that he would display the qualities needed to be the head of a trad family. A woman would feel safe and secure with such a guy, Tara averred, adding (somewhat sniffily, it seemed to me) that “living in a flat with your mate” ain’t gonna cut it if you want to properly land that trad hottie roaming through the wheat field alluringly twirling her French braids.

This advice isn’t terrible, but it isn’t terribly insightful, either. For one thing, it leads the reader to think that trad women all think practically. In fact, neither the heart nor the loins are stirred by the ticking off of items on a “potential husband” checklist. Attraction seldom occurs in such a reasonable, logical manner. And one doesn’t appeal to a potential mate by making an effort to be “appealing.” You can’t push a button and suddenly become The Man a Traditionalist Woman Wants.

And even if you could do so, would it be worthwhile? Would you not, deep down, feel like an ass for attempting to become a different sort of man, just to make somebody like you, instead of trying to become the best you you can be, and letting the attraction happen on its own… or not happen, whichever eventuality may be in the cards?

Interestingly, Tara’s partner in thoughtcrime Brittany Pettibone, spoken of above, made a similar point in a recent solo video of hers…

In this battle of the trad-friendly brunettes, score one for the Yank!

Andy Nowicki, assistant editor of Alternative Right, is the author of eight books, including Under the NihilThe Columbine PilgrimConsidering Suicide, and Beauty and the Least. He occasionally updates his blog when the spirit moves him to do so. Visit his Soundcloud page. His author page is Alt Right Novelist.